Going Blank On Purpose

Ever had a moment like this?

I stood before the audience. A hundred faces stared at me, waiting. I was the keynote speaker, the medium-sized attraction. This was it. But my mind went blank. I remembered my name but after that there was_______________ (exactly, nothing). Just a big space my words weren’t occupying.

The crowd coughed, trying to jolt me into action. Somewhere in the distance a fire engine passed, siren-blaring. Perhaps sent to rescue me. I gulped but the ground refused to swallow me up. Both of us, the floor and I, our mouths seized shut. That’s when I walked off the stage.

Since that accidental awkward silence, over ten years ago, I’ve spoken publicly over 400 times. That one-off moment taught me a great deal about preparation. “Achievement” writes journalist Malcolm Gladwell, “is talent PLUS preparation”.  You can’t just turn up and perform. But when it comes to preparation, the secrets for doing well in the future often lie in the journey we’ve already made.

So, let me pose a question.

What would the line of your last decade look like if you were to chart the up and downs?

My guess is it wouldn’t be a straight line, but more like a pulse rate monitor. There would be ups (I hope), downs (alas, they happen to us all, some of them whilst public speaking) and flat bits where you really weren’t sure what was going on. Or is that just me every morning before caffeine takes effect?

Imagine doing this on a piece of blank paper. Horizontal line across the middle marking out the last ten years to the present day. Vertically up the left hand side a scale from -10 (the sad-awful stuff) rising to +10 (the amazing-proud stuff). Oh, just like that picture there. How handy.

Imagine your line. Its course would be unique. If it looks random, this confirms you are a human not a robot.

Now, a single line can never capture the story of your last decade.  Our lives are rich and strange (or is it just strange to feel rich?) But doing this simple exercise, on paper or mentally, can help pick out key high/low moments from which to learn. A strange paradox: Preparing for the unknown. I so happen to believe life is not an accidental mish-mash but we can influence the lines our lives take.

The day I write this is the 10 Year Anniversary of the mentoring work of Lifespace Trust. A decade in which our mentors have individually supported 968 young people. We’ve had ups (I’ve just been handed a cheque for £10,000 towards our work!) and we’ve had downs (a few significant mistakes of my doing come to mind).

Ten years ago I sat in a café in Stratford and on a blank sheet of paper I wrote what I wanted to see happen. Then with a clear idea of what I wanted, I talked to people who knew what I needed to know, and who cared. This afternoon I’m going out to the same café - but for a fresh coffee - with another blank sheet. I will chart the course of our last ten years, like you can do yours. Then ask some questions.

Notice the highs: ‘What might this suggest? How can we do more of that?’

Look at the lows: ‘How did that happen? What can we learn from that?’ Then talk it through with trusted people to get a 360° perspective.

 

The next decade – yours and ours - will have wobbles. But sometimes creating a blank moment on purpose is a golden chance to pause. Look how far you’ve already come. A reminder to hope. An invitation to dream. It’s time to live life on purpose and have something useful to say.