Revision...made easier

We've all been there haven't we?

Knowing a certain task needs doing, right about NOW, but feeling like our oomph has disappeared. *Checks in pockets. Opens and closes draws. No. No sign of Oomph*

 

Our get up and go seems to have strecthed its legs and quietly left the building, checking Twitter as it goes. If only we could keep our oomph in a safe place, eh? The truth is that motivation is not complicated, we just need a few starting points.

The Escape Key decided to live up to its name...
and went off to find your Oomph.

As exam time looms, and the word  'Revision' (said in a whisper) becomes ever present on the lips of parents and teachers, it's possible that someone you know will be facing this motivation dilemma on a daily basis.

 

Maybe someone in your household.

 

Maybe it's you.

 

In our mentoring work at Lifespace Trust we will be working closely with about a hundred young people who will be sick to death of the R word by the end of April.

 

 

So, for their indulgence, here are just four simple tips to make it a touch easier, all beginning with... the letter R.

 

1. Realistic.

Some things just aren't realistic for some young people, like not checking Facebook for a week. Not staying up too late. Not putting their dishes in the sink. Exam time is NOT going to turn a teenager into a Saint. But the good news is that many essentials of 'how to revise' are within reach of most young people.
 

Tip one - set a realistic goal for each day. For example, five hours revision a day may not be realistic and may cause stress and friction, and constant checking of Twitter. But an hour before dinner and an hour afterwards as a minimum may well be. Keep your goals do-able. If you're not in the mood, start with the idea of doing just ten minutes, then notice how you get into it. Starting is the hardest part. Accept it takes time for the brain to warm up.

 

2. Routine.

We do many things without trying simply because they are part of our routine. They are a
habit. Putting your trousers on before you go out the door? Tick. Cleaning your teeth so you don't knock your friends out? Tick. Those are good routines.

Tip Two - revision needs to be routine, not ad hoc.

Stick to the same place for revising the same subject (but using different rooms for different subjects can also work). Stick to the same start and finish time, just like having a dinner time and a bedtime. Find your rhythm and you will waste less time and mental energy convincing yourself to make a start.

 

3. Recycle.

Immediately after revising, the brain does this special thing called forgetting. By recycling I

don't mean collecting your exam notes and putting them through the shredder, tempting as that might be. I mean at the end of each day flick through what you've just revised, again.

Think about the word 'Revision': To look at again and again.

 

Tip Three - At the end of each day/week, flick through what you've revised. Go over and over, not in depth, but in breadth. Give yourself a few minutes to have some 'A-ha! Oh yeah!' moments. Pause if you have to.

 

4. Result.

Ask yourself the question "How will I feel when I HAVE done this piece of work?" Fast forward an hour or two.

Tip four - Focus on what the result will be like. Then picture yourself doing what you
need to be doing. When we shift our focus from our current mood (e.g. boredom) to our
desired mood (e.g. satisfaction) we can find the door to our Oomph is unlocked, and
pushed ajar, ready to let us back in.

 

Finally, I remember the day before I ran the Dublin marathon walking past a billboard which read: "There may be days when you don't feel you can. But there will be a lifetime knowing that you have." Now is the time to make the difference. No teenager I've worked with over the last 18 years ever regretted being too prepared. Because when you've given your all, there is another R to look forward to. Relaxing in the knowledge you gave it 100%.

An extra mile?

“Anybody can do what I’m doing but you’ve got to want it with all your heart.”

Pat Farmer is possibly not a name you’ve heard of, unless Australian Politics is your specialist Mastermind subject. And although Pat Farmer may not be a name you remember for long, his feat may be something you never forget. Perhaps his feet will also linger long in your memory.

Have you ever felt pushed to the limit? You know that gnawing sense of wanting to give up, when each day lasts 25 hours and each week is nine days long? I guess most of us have.

If this is the case right now, then remember Pat’s words. 

“Anybody can do what I’m doing but you’ve got to want it with all your heart.” 

Pat is a former car mechanic who on the 19th January this year - having been out for a run - finally arrived at his destination. His journey took him through snow blizzards and sweltering jungles; he faced armed bandits and polar bears; he narrowly avoided being killed by a crashing-truck and he ended up with two black feet that resembled mince meat. He’s not black, just his feet.

For 288 days, Pat ran. 

From the North Pole, to the South Pole, Pat ran. In one go, through 14 countries without a day off. As amazing as he is, he didn’t actually run across the seas in between, though.

Pat clocked up 13,000 miles, running equivalent to 500 marathons in a row without a break. Most days were 50-milers. 

But there was a reason. 

There is always a reason to keep going and not give up, you just have to find it and hold onto it. Hold onto it tightly with both hands and both feet if necessary.

“People think I’m some kind of superhuman. But I hurt all night. And in the morning I’m like a cripple until I get going and loosened up" says Pat.

None of us are super-human but we can all choose to keep going towards our horizon when we hold onto our reasons. 

What kept Pat going? “I endured a lot on the run but the people of South America, East Timor and Africa who have no clean water. Those victims of earthquakes and flood and famines. They have it tough too.” Pat was running for Red Cross and raising awareness of their work around the world. Even the Polar Bears know about them now.

Reading Pat’s story (1) has jolted my perception of what’s tough...again. For what it’s worth, here are three thoughts his story provokes in me:

1. Look out. We all need a cause beyond ourselves to help us through tough times. A picture bigger than our own portrait. “Who else is this goal / task for?”
2. Think long. While I’m not (yet) tempted to run 500 marathons on the bounce, I like that sense of a joined-up journey. Of making the horizon of dreams stretch out beyond the span of my own control. “Where - and to whom - does this goal lead me next?”
3. Start here. Even when your feet are mashed and your bones ache and you’ve hurt all night, just go another step.  All the steps join up. “I’ve come this far” can be an energy-giving thought while you loosen up.

So, whatever you and I face right now - however steep the climb, foggy the view, or puzzling the place we find ourselves - let's remember Pat Farmer. He believes. So can we.

“Anybody can do what I’m doing but you’ve got to want it with all your heart.”

(1) Men's Running magazine, April 2012, pp.23-24. Story by Jon Edwards.

Mentoring: Four questions every mentor should ask, every time

Questions, questions, questions...
Who was the first person to milk a cow, and what did they think they were doing?
Who was the first person to ask a question? Was it an open, closed, funnelling or rhetorical question? So many questions. I wonder how many there are...

I've sometimes wondered...Where do all the questions go? And what would happen if we ran out of questions?
Would it be like running out of chocolate?

The 17th century-born philosopher, Voltaire said:
 "Judge a person by their questions, rather than their answers."
Hmm, wise words indeed.

Now, why am I going on like this? Because questions are central to the mentoring process, aren't they? You've probably noticed the effect that questions can have.

Here are 4 top questions every mentor should ask, whether in a school, business, faith or other setting. They work well in every session providing structured anchor points and in time a feeling of familiarity.

1. What's on your mind, today?
This question is a missile to the 'very present' moment. It offers the chance to talk about what's most important to the other person, in that instant. The answer might be "er...nothing much" but the physiology will tell you either that's true or not and guide you as to what you do/ask next. Without this question, the most pressing matter(s) may not come to light.

2. What do you want, today?
Most mentoring sessions are time-limited. It's possible to talk lots about not much, but we want purpose-filled not nonsense-filled conversations. How often do people press 'pause' and have a chance to give this question a thought. How often do we think about what we're thinking about? Good question. Even Jesus asked a blind man 'What do you want?' side-stepping assumption and hearing what the other person wanted the outcome to be.

3. How can I help?
Mentors have resources, contacts and expertise at their disposal, much of which is unconscious, that is it is 'not being currently thought of'. This question permissions the other person to request or bargain and open up the door to new resources. Sometimes the answer to this is 'Just listen to me. How affirming can being really listened to be for someone? My friend Tim calls it 'Exquisite listening'. Yep, I like that.

4. What will you do next?
This is a good question to ask near the end of the session. It is action-focused and works well with setting goals, and providing forward momentum. Don't get stuck, move the thinking forward, and encourage them to be 'at cause' (that is, taking responsibility) rather than 'effect' (what others will do for them).

I wonder what other questions you might want to ask, that you've noticed work well. Oh...and did you spot what's in common about all 4 of the above questions?

Is that the time? Gotta go and do some research about the origins of cow-milking - how much fun might that be?